These past weeks I had lots of conversations with people in my life who typically are grounded and positive people. These individuals have stability and lots of good stuff in their lives. What all of these conversations had in common was is in some way, shape, or form every person I talked with was sounding and feeling frantic. Decisions that could be and should be delayed felt like an immediate resolution was needed, meetings and plans that could be put off for weeks felt like they should happen NOW. Everyone was having difficulty with setting boundaries and using that beautiful word “no”, self care was not happening. Families needs were daunting, overwhelming, too much. The wear and tear of what we need to be doing during #COVID19 for everyone’s safety felt piled on in one fell swoop so that all decisions and actions were of an immediate, critical nature. I could feel people imploding.
It is understandable why people are scared and frazzled. This pandemic is massive. We all have varying degrees of impact. Yet if you thing about it, our futures have always been uncertain. That has not changed. What has changed is our perception of our futures. We used to feel like we were in control of our future. In realty what we controlled was our actions, decisions, responses, and reactions. Our realty of what we control during COVID19 is our actions, decisions, responses, and reactions.
Albert Einstein said “The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking”.
The life changes going on during COVID19 are going to be here for awhile. How you cope and deal with what is happening can help you. You can become a better version of person you are. There is a quote, I am not sure who wrote it, that says “when life puts you in tough situations don’t say “Why me”, say “Try me”. If you think about the meaning behind the quote it is do you want to approach your life from a victim standpoint or a warrior one?
Seems like a great day to use some stop, look, and listen!
Stop means what is says. STOP! Take a stop in your life. Pause what is going on. Take stock of where you are physically and mentally. Breathe, be still, listen to your breathing, listen to the sounds around you. If you can go outside for a walk, or go outside and breathe the air. Be at one with yourself. If you are feeling frazzled and rushed with decisions, stop to determine if these decisions HAVE TO BE MADE RIGHT AWAY or if there can be a pause. Say no to anything and everything you can say no to. Take time to fill up your personal energy. Gather some facts and information.
Take a look at who you are and what you are doing with your life. Are you happy and proud of the choices you are making? Does your living space, body, self care reflect that you are a priority in your life? Are you eating pretty healthy, getting decent sleep, getting some activity and movement or eating too many carbs, junk food, and rarely moving? Is your living space mostly orderly or very messy? How about your car? In an article by WebMD describes how “Mess equals stress” and how clutter can negatively affect your health. The other end of the spectrum is does everything in your life so “perfect” that if something is messy or not in it’s place you get tense and stressed? Do you feel you need to look perfect, dress perfect? Do you feel people around you need to be perfect? An article in CNN stated “”The reasons why perfectionists are usually low in mindfulness include focusing on the past or the future excessively and not the here and now,” Flett said, adding they also “have difficulties with being authentic and genuine due to the need to project an image of being perfect.”Taking stock of how you are living your life can be an eye opening experience in a super positive way. Use it as a way to move towards feeling more satisfied and happy in your life.
Listen to yourself. Listen to that inner voice, intuition, gut instinct that sometimes can be mighty quiet and mighty persistent with guiding you to make choices that are healthy for you. If you are not happy with how you are living you life begin by making a change here and a change there. Be consistent with your changes. Studies have shown it takes about 66 days for a new behavior to become more of an automatic habit. Make tweaks where you want to make tweaks. Feelings do not lie. Our personal intuition does not lead us astray. Listen to that voice telling you to do this or do that. You will be the better for it. You do not need to make lots of changes all at once. Pick one that you want to work on. Take it day by day. Be kind and gentle with your inner voice. Remember every day you are doing to best you can with what you have and who you are.
“To Thine Own Self Be True” Shakespeare
The power of all of this is when you stop, look, and listen to yourself, it will influence everyone around you. Because you are calmer there will be a ripple of calm touching those around you. Have a cooking mishap, create a fancy new name for the dish you created. Kids playing in the kitchen sink while you are trying to workout and too much water gets spilled look at it as a way to clean the kitchen floor. Feeling like you need to take one minute to breathe? Breathe away. If you have people in your life you are caring for, have them join you in a one minute mindful breathing moment. Add boundaries and structure to how you are living your life. Show kindness to others.
There are only a few things in life that requires urgent, this moment, true life or death decisions. The rest of life we can find balance, calm, joy, and happiness ever during a pandemic.
So most amazing, spectacular person be good to yourself. Take the time to pause and be you in your life. You so matter and so deserve to treat yourself wonderfully!
May your STOP. LOOK. LISTEN. be with you💜