blog You Matter

You Matter ❤️ Trust

Trust is defined as firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something by Dictionary.com. According to Wikipedia trust is confidence in or dependence on a person or quality.

Trust is a big deal. It is the foundation of our relationships with others. It is the basis of how we make most, if not all, of the decisions we make in our life. Something less talked is the trust we have within our selves. Seems like a GREAT day to talk about trust.

Globally there is a lack of trust, and faith in each other. We take sides, feel people are right or wrong. As a society and as a world we too often lack trust in how other individuals do well, pretty much everything. We don’t trust other countries, political parties, religions, different cultures, races, people. It’s like a virus that had spread all over the world, My personal thoughts about this is that I feel this lack of trust and faith (which it completely connected to trust) is many people live in a world of fear. We live being scared about what others may do to us, wondering what harm could come our way. It’s like we live in a world of cold pricklies. We live our lives looking out for ourselves and questioning the intention and actions of others.

The dense fog of this mistrust hides the fact, yes fact, that there is so much goodness, kindness, and amazing people in our world all around us. We limit our chance to get to know other humans, stunting our growth, and the growth of others around us. We can live our lives in fear. Yet what if we lived our lives with trust? That the world is good and people are good?

Last week in the news there was a TRUE story about two teens who were carried out into the ocean by a riptide in Florida. After two hours they were getting weaker from swimming and things were not looking so good. They started praying and asking for help from the Universe. Guess what? A boat named Amen came to their rescue.

In our inner circles of relationships trust is a necessary ingredient to have healthy relationships. If you do not have trust in a relationship it is not bound together. Trust is the glue for any relationship. So what do you do if someone damages your trust in them, or you damage another person’s trust in you? Do you let the person rebuild trust with you and give another chance? If you are in the wrong are you willing to do the work to rebuild trust? Trust can be rebuilt if people are willing to do the work.

Dave Willis wrote “You don’t have to trust someone in order to forgive them, but you do have to forgive them to make trust possible again”.

I live my life being transparent and truthful. It is super important to me that I talk the talk and walk the walk in my relationships.  There are times in my work as a therapist and social worker I have to take actions regarding safety to someone I am working with. Even though I began our relationship explaining what is confidential and when I need to share information there have been times when individuals get upset with me and lose trust in me. Even though I know I needed to take an action that one is hard on me. I also know it is harder on the other person. Something is going on in their life that is not good, and potentially dangerous. In case you were wondering what I do (of course you were wondering who could not😜) I DO NOT take it personally. I continue to build a relationship using compassion and understanding. It is super hard work and very much worth every ounce of energy and care I put into it. Do things turn out the way I hope every time? Nope. What I do have to trust is that hopefully at some point the person will see my actions came from a place of caring about them.

What about trust in ourselves? Do you believe in the reliability, strength, ability of yourself? Do you believe in your confidence and actions? Trust within ourselves is a big deal. Having faith that we can do whatever goals we set out to do because of who we are. WOW that’s a big one. People in our lives can harm our confidence, faith, trust within ourselves. Yet at the end of the day our inner self talk is a battle in our brain only. We are the only ones talking to ourselves.

If you do not have trust in yourself it is time to get to trust, faith, confidence bootcamp. Figure out DAILY actions you will take to build your self trust. Every skill in your life you built by doing it over and over and over again, usually with instruction, help, and guidance. Building self trust requires the same work. We are not born with a confidence, trust gene. We have to work at it! Better yet, the more you trust who you are as a person the more you will trust the world around you!

As Scottie Waves said “Trust yourself. Trust your own intuition. Another’s mind is not walking your journey, you are”.

You are an amazing, remarkable person! You matter because you are the only one bringing your you to the world! There is so much good in this world including all the talents, experiences and kindness you bring.

Thank you for being you and bringing your you to the world❤️

 

 

 

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