The past week or so I have been experiencing heartache. Heartache is emotional distress or suffering, great worry. My heart has been hurting.
A little background on me. My chosen profession, truth be told I think it chose me as in high school I LOVED math and was quite good at math, is I am a Social Worker. In NY where I reside I am a LCSW-R. You could call me a counselor, therapist, whatever word floats your boat. My day gig is at a high school and I have a part-time private practice. When my girls were growing up I reminded them that people paid to talk to me😜
I have a few teens that I work with where things are not going well. Their depression and life circumstances are a living hell for them. One my kids (whomever I work with becomes part of my tribe) has gone missing. Missing in the sense where she is getting more into the world of addiction and dependency and other dark things. Missing in the sense she rarely comes to school. These teens are bright, kind, caring, amazing young people. Their hurt, pain, and suffering is real. Life hurts for them every day. We are using every support available to help. Sometimes that is not enough. I also have a friend who is going through an incredibly tough time. In my practice of few of my clients have experienced horrific things.
So while my heart is aching for all of these incredible humans I have the honor to know and to help I began to ramp up and increase my self-care. Unfortunately for all of us there have been times in our lives where the people we love and who are near and dear to our hearts have horrible things going on. We are watching things unfold for others feeling paralyzed because we are unable to stop the madness.
The best gift, help, and support we can give to others is to be at our best and give our best. My job is to directly support, listen, process, and empower others. If I am not in a good place emotionally and with positive energy I won’t be as helpful, and perhaps I might unintentionally bring them down instead of pulling them up to a better place. I am a stubborn, persevering, pain in the a** you can do this person. While this is my profession it is also part of who I am. Giving others comfort, care, healing, and hope exudes out of me. Yet I CAN’T do any of it unless I take incredible care of me.
To help me I have reached out to my trusted supports to let them know that I am struggling. I am making sure I get some fitness in and have spending a lot of time in the great outdoors because that restores me. While I am a pretty healthy eater with a good dose of junk I am limiting my junk food intake. Sleeping is always important because none of us can function without it. My focus is on what brings me happiness and joy.
Does my heart still ache? Yes. Do I feel better ready to support, help and empower? Yes. It is not always easy to be a human in this world. There is so much going on that pull the rug from under your feet in a moments’ notice. Life is hard. When you are good to yourself you are better to everyone around you. I cannot fix anyone’s problems or life, no one can. What we can do is help to support and care for those in our lives going through get difficulty. We can offer help and healing. First we need to be taking great care of ourselves.
“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel” Eleanor Brown
When you are having heartache for the people who are near and dear to your heart or because of events in your own life take wonderful care of you. Do kind, caring actions for yourself. Building yourself up with only help everything around you. You are needed in this crazy, wonderful thing called life💝
Thank you for being you and bringing your you to the world💜